I don’t know if you’ve noticed, but what I can tell from popular memes and our current stranger-than-fiction reality is that 2016 has felt like a real toilet-buster. If you’ve found yourself screaming, crying, sleeping too much, crying, snapping at people, crying, and/ or hiding from life while crying, please remember the following:

You aren’t alone. Save the effort of chastising yourself for feeling awful or for not doing enough. These memes exist and spread widely because a lot of us are struggling. Know who your closest and best cheerleaders are and let them help you battle your inner meanies. The My Little Pony reboot got it right: friendship really is magic.

You have the power to ground yourself when you feel shaky, restless, or disconnected. Counting out measured inhales and exhales, going outside, stepping on earth, holding a stone in your palm — these practices can draw you back into your steady self. Focus is key. Let yourself experience the sensations of what you are doing. Give full awareness to your mindful task, even if your moment of Zen is truly just a few moments.

Cover your basic bases. Stop to drink water, make time to eat, move your body, hug somebody, spend time alone, get enough sleep. If you have a headache, take an aspirin. If your house is a trash pile, maybe let your mindfulness exercise be just five minutes of tidying without distractions. If you find you have time and energy at some juncture, prep snacks and water so they are at the ready for the next day. Don’t beat yourself up if the mere suggestion of prepping seems too overwhelming for your state of being. Just grab a Gatorade and some crackers and enjoy them on your trash pile. This is what surviving looks like.

You are enough and you are special and perfect exactly as you are. You’re going to think that sounds stupid, but guess what? You have too many voices in your head judging everything you say and do, and I am giving you permission to think something nice for a change. If you need your cynical and cutting snark, cool, keep it. But balance it out. Allow for one honestly kind thought to eke its way into existence for every despairing, self-loathing one. You are the only you we have and you are worth cocooning in sweetness. If you have trouble with this, outsource. See the “friendship is magic” tenet above. Maybe watch that TV show, too. Self-care can look like many things; rainbow-haired and featherwinged might be the antidote to a gray (or Cheeto-colored) world.

Take care and be well!